Longing

It is a hunger pang
One I can never satisfy
With your saturated fats
Your half-hearted apologies
They fill me up with fallacies
Like a jelly donut

You are a sugar high
That drops me from the edge of the sky
You leave me more alone
Than I have ever been before

These cravings
Carve me like a jack-o-lantern
Leave me hollow
With an artificial grin
Leave me searching for something
For which I can truly sink my teeth in

But there is so substance in you
No nutritional value
You are my most unnecessary indulgence
The temptation of which
Has unmatched expectations

Your nectar protected by an endless buzz of bees
For even a single drop of your honey
I feel the sharpest of stings
And it aches at the very core of my being--
This endless, irrepressible longing.

Creaking of walls and the clatter of these keys
My fingers are tiny worker bees
I am the queen of misery

I forgot about nights like these
The kind that knock and lock your knees
Remind you how lonely, lonely can be
On that long drive home from happiness
Rolling tires and tears
Changing minds, grinding gears

I think I've given too much to you
Outsourced my emotion
So you're the puppeteer
And I am here, hands on keys
Creaking walls, buckled knees

Wishing desperately
I could work without strings.

Unobtrusive love

Unobtrusive love

Beats within me now, and

He should no longer feel disturbed by it

The beat is soft and quiet

Like a child's cry

Like a whispered goodbye

From where he sleeps so peacefully

He won't know I am awake

With this ache in my bones

I miss him, now inconspicuously

So ambiguously that no one can tell

Since they all say to abandon this hope

That flickers like a low-burning flame

That ties everything to his name

That burns assumably, in vain

I let it burn just the same